Fallen

I can't stand it when someone falls away from God, especially people who were once strong believers. Those people in the past would never be caught dead doing that type of behavior. Lately, I have been thinking about this and asking myself a question of why. After thinking about it I came up with an answer. Equally yoked is the reason why. 2 Corinthians 6:14 talks about how Christians should not be around unbelievers. I think this verse is so true. Now completely not being around unbelievers is ridicules because how will the lost be saved. But when nonbelievers are around then we must be really careful. If someone starts to hang out with a nonbeliever and they are a believer, the world with in the nonbeliever can rub off on the believer. The world is the reason why people fall away from God. Satan uses the temptations of the World as a way to get people to fall away from Him. Satan uses the nonbeliever as a tool. The more time we spend with the nonbeliever the more like them we will be. This principle is not just biblical but also physiological. It is proven we become like the people we spend the most time with. There is away to spend tons of time with nonbelievers and not be equally yoked. Have a solid, firm foundation in God is the key. Have a firm foundation will repel the world because knowing God intimately will always win out. If someone is a believer and has fallen away this is most likely why. So how do they come back to God? Start spending time with believers again. If you are around the world 247 you are in the world 247. If you are around God 247 you are just out of this world!

P.S. Praying always and reading the Bible will help too!

Christmas Lights

Todays is the day I get to start putting up Christmas Lights. I am so excited this year to do so. In the past I only got to put up lights on our patio because we lived in an apartment and a condo. Now we live in a duplex and the owner said its ok to put up lights. Of course being in a duplex I want the whole house to look even, so I will decorate their side too. If you live in the area you have to check it out when it is all done. Thinking I will be done by the end of the week. Also at work I have to decorate the stage in the CHASM. I go all out for this because it is fun but for the kids. I hang tons of lights and I have a box that makes the lights dance to music. Its really cool and a must see. So if you are at Woodland this weekend they will be all up dancing. Lets just say I have a lot of lights and decorating to do this week. But I still have to do my usual work stuff and school stuff. I have two papers due this week at school, both long and I'm not feeling doing either. Christmas season I just want to just relax and do christmas stuff. Hopefully I can get all this stuff done and my lights up. Well there is no hopefully because if I have a goal in mind I just go out and do it, but I might be tired by the end of the week.

DW

DW stands for Do Work. This week of Thanksgiving that is exactly what I have been doing. This week for work it is only a two day work week. I could have come in on Monday, but stated in my previous blog NO. So I have two days to get ready for the weekend. I had to do a weeks worth of prep in two days to make the weekend the same quality. The word DW is appropriate for that! I got focused and did it and now the weekend will be great. By the way this Saturday night will be the first ever Children's Church on the playground! Going to be great. For school I had to DW as well. I had to do two test (One essay) and a paper. I wanted to get it done by thanksgiving so I don't have to worry about it. The professor did give us a day extension due to the holiday, but I want it done now. So I buckled down and DW. I got both my test done on Monday and I finished my paper today. Everything is turned in this week and I can enjoy my break! Crazy what I can get accomplished if I just DW. It makes me wonder however how much time I waste in a week at work or with school work. But I wont think about that, I will just enjoy the accomplishments of doing some hard work.

Day Off

Today is Monday, which means it is my day off. Time to get things done and most importantly take a break from work. Now I love my work so much and those kids are the funniest hungriest for God ever, but taking a day off from everything is good. Hey God did it after He created the World. On my day off I answer no e-mails, and no phone calls unless it is an emergency from church. Thank goodness for caller id! I am the only one on staff at church who takes Mondays off instead of Fridays. After Sunday church around 12:30 I don't have to go back until 9 Tuesday. So Tuesday is like the start of the week for me. If I had Friday off my week would start on Saturday at 4, but then I would get Sunday afternoon off then back on Monday at 9. I tried this and epic failure. I felt more stressed by taking Friday off. I need Friday at the church to set up for the weekend. I takes me about 4 hours to set up for Children's Church. Oh I would love to have my own space, but since I have to share the space with Student ministry, daycare, and other groups I have to take down and put it up again. Gets boring really fast, but I do it all for the kids I love so much. If I had Friday off I would have to come in early on Saturday, and that would be no fun. So I like my Monday being off and Brittany only works tell 2. Afternoons and evening I get some Brittany time on my day off too. School/house/yard work in the morning and Brittany in the afternoon. Can't beat that!

Expectations

This is a few thoughts on expectations. Expectations can be good, but for the most part bad. If you expect something to happen and it does not come true, then you feel bad. In my life I know I live through expectations, and I can tell you that it hurts. When expectations are not met then feelings get hurt. Plain and simple as that. This makes senses, but do i have no expectations, NO. Expecting someone to do something is all about trust. When someone does not meet your expectations, then your trust for them is hurt. Of course there are unrealistic expectations. These are things that you wish to happen from other people and usually don't. These expectations would take a change in the person you wish it upon for the expectation to come true. Unrealistic expectations hurt much more then regular expectations. I have been hurt by both. That is why the only person to put trust in and when you expect something, unrealistic or not is God. God keeps His promises, the only problem is that God will for our lives is different then our will for our life. So if we see and expectation that we feel God did not meet, don't get hurt just remember that God is bigger and looking out for our best interest. This is what I have experienced in my life with expectations, and I am still struggling with!

Wave

I always been self motivated. When I want something I go out and do it. I see the big picture and know what I have to do. This attitude is the reason why I am self motivated. A classic example of me being self motivated was for my bachelor's degree from Warner University. All the classes were on-line. On-line classes require more work than regular classes. For one more reading and you have to stay on top of everything! I knew that completing my degree would result in getting my degree and getting more money from work/higher job status. So I saw the big picture and went after it. I hit the ground running and completed my degree in two years with a GPA of 3.8. When I applied for the degree they questioned me because I was too young. They knew that 20 somethings were as motivated as 30 somethings. Well I proved them wrong. After completing my degree I was tired from the hard work and took the year off. This fall I started my Masters degree on-line which should take me the same amount of time to finish my bachelors. Only one problem with that thought, my lack of self motivation. I describe my motivation for school like a wave. At times I feel really motivated, but others I have none at all and want to stop. Just like a wave has a crest, then falls off. So I guess the lack of motivation would be due to the lack of big picture I see. Would I get more money or change of status at work, No. Would I get a masters degree, Yes. Would I waste time and money getting it, Yes. So why do it then? I guess the only thing motivating me is just the thought of having a paper say Liberty Theological Seminary has conferred on Michael Wilder the degree of Masters of Discipleship Ministries. Sounds good, but so what!

God's Time

Today I read a great verse for my devotional found in 2 Peter 3:8-9. Peter is one of Jesus' disciples and is the one that the church was to be built upon based on Jesus' instructions to him. In this passage Peter is talking about God's time. I always knew that God's time is different from our time. For example my belief is that when God created the Earth in 6 days, it was not actually six of our days, but His days. Why I say this is the scientific research associated with fossil records etc.. I don't tell a lot of people this belief I have, but after reading these verses it was so cool to me in two ways. Verse 8 says that With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. So the first cool thing is this verse in relation to my thoughts about creation. The second cool thing is in verse 9 that says The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you. This verse is cool because again talking with time our definition of slow is different then God's definition. People pray and ask God to do something for them, or rely on a promise they read in the Bible, but when it does not happen in their time they get upset. A great thing is that we might get upset because God's timing is not our own, but He is patient with us. God loves us! Yes it might take a long time for God to answer a prayer or to give us a blessing, but usually God is doing it in His timing. I am thankful He is because if we get it now, we might not be as ready for it. Just remember that God's time is different then our time and His time is usually the right time. If only they sell wrist watches with God's time on it instead of digital time!

The Year of the parent

I have been planning for next year since September and in correlation to planning I have been reading several books. Think Orange, Parenting Beyond your capacity, and now Transforming children into spiritual champions and all of these books have a common theme. This theme is minister to the parents and the children. Ministering to the children looks like the same I have been doing, but ministering to the parents is something new. Parents get around 3,000 hours a year to influence their children, while the church only gets 40 hours. With that math I want to minister to the parents. I started to do this in August by having the first KFC open house for the parents. A time in which parents can come and experience worship with their kid. Sadly only 5 parents came that whole weekend. In September I had hope, because we did a parenting class and around 80 parents came to the class to hear me speak on how to help grow their child spiritually and why it is important. With that momentum and reading these books I decided that next year will be the year of the parent. I want to equip, educate, and create a new type of parent. Several ideas that will go down to do this will be two parenting classes the first Wednesday nights of the new semester. One in January and one in August. Also there will be five open houses in KFC to promote family worship. These will be a fun shared experience and of course food! I also want to do some more, but have not thought of it yet. If you have any ideas let me know. I will keep everyone posted through out next year on how the year of the parent will be.

Leader vs Manager

This was a topic for my school and thought it was good thoughts on my part so I will share them hear.

It is said that leaders and managers are two different groups of people. Bennis and Nanus suggest that, “managers are people who do things right and leaders are people who do the right things.” This suggestion on what leaders and managers are tends to be perceived as leaders are better than managers. I personally would rather do the right thing, then just do things that are right. This perception leads only to assuming that managers have to work harder then leaders. Doing things right takes work or sweat equity, but at the same time when faced with a tough decision doing the right thing is a hard choice. Overall, I believe that from this statement that managers and leaders have to perform different tasks that require different types of hard work.

I also believe that some people are only leaders and some are just managers. These leaders show vision and set goals that will better themselves or the organization (effectiveness). Managers show skills in the everyday life, through scheduling and maintaining the statuesque (efficiency). I am thankful that I have managers who work with me, there role is to keep the train on the track. Occasionally, the train might become derailed and this is when I must step in to get it back on track. To me that is the relationship between a manager and leader. However, I do believe that people can be both. There is a rare occasion when someone comes along that possesses both gifts. A person I believe that fits the description of Bennis and Nanus, as well as James Lipham, who said that leadership has to do with changing goals while management deals with maintain structure, is Walt Disney.

Walt Disney is one of the top business men in the 20^th century. His drive, principles, precision, and vision made it possible for the company called “Disney” to exist. His leadership skill and administration ability made the company exploded into what we see today. As a manager Walt built a company known for quality and detail. To me quality and detail are characteristics of a manager. These characteristics contributed to a successful company. This success shows in the revenue and attendance of the theme parks. When I go to the Magic Kingdom, the quality and detail of the park and the employees are seen. Walt set principles in how to run theme parks and implemented them. When it came time for Walt to begin construction on Walt Disney World, he did not rest on past accomplishments, but kept his eye on the future. He had vision and gathered people around him to achieve this vision. This vision is seen in Epcot, Hollywood Studios, and Animal Kingdom theme parks. He dreamed this up, but died to see them come true. However, by him gathering followers, this dream became a reality. In regards to leaders and managers, I believe that Walt Disney has a balance between effectiveness and efficiency.

One of my key personal verses is Mark 9:35. Here Jesus calls the Disciples to sit down and He tells them if anyone wants to be first they must be last and a servant of all. The reason why this is one of my key verses is that it describes what type of leader I want to be. In my ministry of children, I oversee children 5 to 11 years old and a volunteer base of around 30. When it comes to my volunteers I have to be a leader. When I lead, I want to be like Jesus and that to serve His followers. Jesus served the people, and by doing so He lead them. I try to serve my volunteers by helping them with their lesson, gathering supplies, dealing with unruly children, and cast vision to get them stoked about children’s ministry. Yet during the week I feel like a manager. I schedule the children’s church and maintain the children’s ministry. I report to the pastor, he is the leader, and he hired me to leaded the ministry, but also manage it as well. In regards to Bennis and Nanus statement of managers and leaders, I would have to agree with them. I feel like I manage during the week and lead during the weekend. I need to be efficient during the week in my prep so that for the weekend I can be effective with the children. If I do my job right during the week, the weekend can run smoothly. Luckily for me I have other people that work for me that help me out during the week. These people are definitely managers, due to them keeping the focus on reaching the goal or mission for the children’s ministry. Without these people, I feel that the ministry would not be the same.

I personally believe that a leader rallies the followers to accomplish the goal, while managers arrange the details in order to accomplish the goal. A key role for a leader is to make sure the purpose tank is full. The purpose tank is the vision or the reason why people are doing what they are doing. If the tank is empty people will lose sight of the vision and the quality of the product will go down. A leader needs to recognize when the tank is becoming empty and rally the people or remind them why they are here.

The Five Dysfunctions of a Team

I have never ever read a book in four days. It usually takes me around two weeks but this book was something different. After I read this book my outlook on life was changed by it. Patrick Lencioni the one who wrote the book is a great author who uses a fable to get the point across to the reader. Unlike other books like this the authors just tells how to do it and gives tips to put it into action. The fable with this book was the thing that just blew my mind. During the reading each characterful spoke to me and I could identify them with something. What that something is I can not say, but it was like I was open my eyes for the first time. This book in my opinion is one that any organization that has a team needs to go through. The book talked about the five dysfunctions. The first one is absence of Trust. This is the fear of being vulnerable with team members which prevents the building of trust within the team. The second is the fear of conflict. Conflict is a good thing and can get things done but trust must be established before this can happen.The next is Lack of commitment. The lack of clarity or buy-in prevents team members from making decisions they will stick to. A big thing is the communication is not there. The fourth is avoidance of accountability. The need to avoid interpersonal discomfort prevents team members from holding one another accountable for their behaviors and performance. Creating a culture of equals will create peer accountability. The last dysfunction is Inattention Results. This is when the pursuit of individual goals and presonal status erodes the focus of collective success. Basically the last one is stating being selfish and looking out for yourself or being a team player. These five dysfunctions according to Patrick are a pyramid. You can not expect to work on number five with out working on number one. This book has good practical ways to get the team to fight these dysfunctions and are worth the go. The only issue is that this takes a strong leader to start the process. This leader is the one who is in charge of the organization or team and can not be afraid to make necessary changes for the success of the team. If you are on staff at a church or business you need to read this a then give it to your team members to read too. Due to this one book I am going to read his other book called The Five Temptations of a CEO. This whole leader thing even might change my thought on my seminary degree. Just have to wait and pray!

A long time

I have not been on this thing in a long time. It is not that I don't like blogging or because now my wife has one and I do everything she does. It is because I forgot my user name and password. I hate it when that happens with websites. Thank goodness I have an app that keeps all my user names and passwords. Man I love technology!